Personal Life


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Very weird dreams. Last night I dreamed I was part of Dinner: Impossible and was trying to feed the compound of 1,000-plus with 4 filet steaks. Even in my dream, after starting seasoning the steaks, I realized “This is impossible”. I blame talking about Restaurant: Impossible with Mom, and that Longhorn Steakhouse commercial.

Then I took a nap after breakfast and had this really weird dream about a parade where guys had put gauges (big holes) through their penises, and others had zippers in their scrotums. Ewwww.

Then suddenly I had this small stained glass window in a wooden frame, which I was trying to return to my mother. I had to take this long, winding, torch-lit road back to the start of the parade route. During the walk I encountered more weird “exhibits”, but no one obstructed or molested me.

When I found Mom, she was sitting in the bar of an Applebee’s-type restaurant with her friend Joan. Mom had a bowl of cereal w/ milk in it in front of her. It was almost consumed. I think Joan had a chocolate martini or something like that. Then I woke up.

Very weird dream. I’ll write more later. :)

~S

 

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Had a good visit with Mom & Dad today. Yum-Yums! :)

So glad they came today. I find I live for visitation. :)

After “viso”, they didn’t let us return to our dorms. They brought the dogs in to sniff the visitation park and the parking lot. They also shook down B-dorm… again.

When will B-dorm learn to stop smuggling crap in!? Probably never *eye roll*

They (meaning staff) also inspected hair & facial hair for A & D dorms. Lots of people suddenly went bald when I was at visitation. ;) Mu-hahahahaha

Ugh… Swamp is weaving another conspiracy web of crap to DC. I don’t know how he (DC) can stand spending so much time with Swamp. Sheesh.

Ok. Off to read more. I’ll follow-up tomorrow.

~S

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Received lots of books today. :) Very happy about that. I had a 9:30 call-out at mental health, which didn’t actually see me until 10:30. Normally that wouldn’t be a big deal, but I had a property call-out at 10. :/

Luckily I was able to follow Ms. Peterson during 2nd yard and receive the books, but it fouled up my plan to mail the old books home. It looks like I’ll have to wait until Tuesday to do that. :/

Received my MP3 case and armband as well. Very happy about that.

A surprise was receiving my replacement electric razor. Ecstatic about that. :) :) :) Already did one pass, which removed quite a bit of stubble. I will do a 2nd pass tonight. So nice to be shaven, and I didn’t have to be scraped raw with clippers at the barber shop. :)

Anyway, looking forward to seeing Mom & Dad tomorrow. Off to shave.

~S

P.S. – Pic figured out “Buck” was the one who ripped me off. “Buck” has checked in and will probably be sent to another camp. :(

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The rest of the day wasn’t as crappy as my morning. Which wasn’t hard to do, as it was a really crappy morning.

I wasn’t able to mail my books…. again. That’s two months today that I’ve been trying. However, I was assured that if I show up for legal mail tomorrow, I’ll be able to mail the books. *knock on wood*

It stands to reason, as I have a property call-out at 10 am. I also have a mental health call-out at 9:30, and a canteen call-out at 13:45.

Stephen is going to be busy tomorrow. :)

Less than 100 pages to go on Dance with Dragons. :) I’ll probably be sad when I have to wait for the next book to be released.

Swift and what’s-his-face think it’s hilarious that I keep a journal. :/ F ’em. It helps me, so I’m gonna keep doing it. Making fun of me for doing it is just bullying. Lord knows I’ve seen enough of that in my time. :/

~S

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So it wasn’t an escape, and it (probably) wasn’t short staff. For Black History Month we are having special guests from time to time. Tomorrow we are having the daughter of Ray Charles to speak to us. Thus, a stage was erected during 1st rec, and we didn’t get 2nd rec. Oh well.

I have two questions. First, why is being the offspring of a celebrity a reason for someone to be treated with reverence? So what? Her dad got busy and produced her. It happens every day and those children aren’t asked to speak in prisons. :/

Second, when is Caucasian History month? Or Asian History month? What about Hispanic History, or Arab History? Why do blacks get their dicks sucked, so to speak?

My family is immigrants. We had no part of the stain of slavery in this country. Why should we bear the burden of others actions based upon the color of our skin? For that matter, why should anyone? :(

~S

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Ok, so it wasn’t tomorrow before my next entry. Thhhhhpht!

A thought occurred to me as I was listening to I Would Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That) by MeatLoaf.

What makes me think I can be faithful to my next significant other/girlfriend/wife? Heaven knows I emotionally cheated on Jennifer time and time again. Ok, I wasn’t running around sticking my dick in random women, but I was still cheating by not allowing myself to be able to give 100% to Jenn.

On the other hand, I was faithful to Ashley. But that was a 3-month thing. Even I was faithful to Jenn for longer than that. =/

This is, what I think they would call in SAA, “stinkin’ thinkin”. =(

Perhaps I’m beating myself up unnecessarily, One is always one’s own worst critic. =( Grrrr.

~S

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“Super-Bowl Sauce” smells soooo good. :) Very garlic-y.

So, hopefully Scrabble set tomorrow. When I would play with Jennifer, I hated the game. She would trounce me every time, and it felt like she would belittle me. It’s strange. For someone with as large a vocabulary as I have, you would think I would do better at a game like Scrabble. =/

Been having this weird symptom over the past week. It’s only noticeable when I’m writing, but occasionally my eyes will rapidly go the entire range of motion left to right and left again at random. Actually, they run the range of motion two or three times. This is uncontrollable by myself. It barely disrupts my train of thought, but I would be lying if I said it didn’t at all. =/

I must keep tabs on it. =/ Hell, even if it gets worse, I don’t expect to get any help from Dr. Mayo. :(

~S

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Realized this morning that one benefit (if there can be such) to my confinement is that I usually get to see sunrises on a regular basis. It is breathtaking to behold the beauty of God’s creation. Sunsets too. They fill me with hope. To gaze upon the majestic beauty, that fences and razor wire can not diminish.

Today is Super Bowl Sunday. Honestly, I’ll be glad when it’s over. Bleh! But, at least it should give me a couple of hours of uninterrupted reading time. :)

Gonna try to hit the canteen today, to replenish what was stolen from me. *sigh* I keep telling myself it could have been worse, but I have trouble truly feeling that. Intellectually, I accept it. Emotionally, I don’t. I can’t help feeling like I was singled out because of my charge. =/

Anyway, gonna lay down. It’s a rare opportunity to lay down during count, and I’m gonna make the most of it.

~S

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Had a good visit with the family today. Very lucky to have them around.

Mom’s upset that Grandpop seems to have either forgotten or ignored her birthday yesterday. I feel for her. She doesn’t deserve to be treated that way. Truth be told, she deserves to be treated better than most people have treated her. Myself included.

She’s a gentle spirit, full of love and patience. I think, once I get out, I’ll treat her as the elect sister she is. At least I hope I will. My track record has not been stellar in that department. =/

Ugh… Hot Dog is being very loud. He’s betting his chicken for the rest of the year on the 49’ers to win. This is why I don’t get into sports. All this excitement over a frickin’ game. Bleh!

Anyway, almost count time, and almost a full page. ;)

I’ll replenish my locker supply tomorrow, I think. =/

~S

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The fact that Elena dropped me like a hot potato has been bugging me since I had that dream. On one hand, she really didn’t have any obligation to me. We weren’t going out, after all. But, I thought we were friends. It really does hurt, that she couldn’t even be bothered to write me once, if even to say she doesn’t want to have anything to do with me. =(

Is it enough to snuff the torch I carry/carried for her? I can’t be sure. I wish I could say yes, because this unrequited love I have for her usually borders on painful. =(

But, the lovesick puppy I am, I’d probably eat mud pies if it would make her happy. =/

Love sucks.

~S

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