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I missed a day. I know, I know.. Bad Stephen. Yesterday was pretty sucky. Carlos on Monday asked if I would mind trading shifts with him on Wednesday. He would work my 12–6 shift and I would work his 7–1. I agreed and everything should have been fine. The only problem? Carlos didn’t show up. Grrrrrr.

Randy and I were slammed all day. We both wanted to get out of there, but couldn’t because clients kept coming. It sucked.

So, instead of a 7–1 shift, I had a 7–5 shift. Very long day. The only bright spots were that I was able to take a long lunch and give blood for the blood drive and that, at long last, found out E’s full name.

Elena Pagliarini…. oh yeah. Just looking at it makes me happy.

But I do miss her. Everyday where I don’t see her smiling face is a great day. I know, I’m falling hard for her, and I know I’ll probably get my heart broken, but at the moment I don’t care. I just want to be near her. A planet warmed by the light of the sun, that’s how I feel about her.

-S

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Pretty good day today. I got sorta into an argument with two clients. One decided that he shouldn’t have to pay for a backup 3 weeks after we did it because he didn’t lose any data. Jessie ended up giving him 50% off back as a refund. That’s $50 the store lost because the customer bitched.

Elena had a day off today. The store just isn’t the dame when she isn’t around. It just seems bleaker and gloomier.

I wonder what she would say if she knew I was fixating on her so much. I don’t think I’ve crossed the line into stalker territory, but my OCD has definitely chosen to dwell on her.

Perhaps some distance is in order. I don’t want to be cold to her, but maybe not “hang out” with her the next time we work together. Somehow I think that is easier said than done.

Anyway, blood drive is tomorrow at work, and I’m planning to give. On top of that I need to open the store, so I should get some rest. Ending for the night.

-S

x

Had my first “date” with Elena last night. I’m so giddy when I think of her. It went well, we saw the 2nd transformers movie. It was good, what I saw of it. Honestly I was more interest in the beautiful girl sitting next to me. I was so nervous sitting next to her. This one really matters to me. It’s the first real date I’ve had since Jennifer.

Before the movie, I met her at the Tandori restaurant. I was worried she might just think we were friends, but when I saw the outfit she was wearing my heart jumped for joy. A pair of calf-length pants and a white & green floral top. Yes, that was definitely 1st date attire.

So we had a good meal. I didn’t order my usual Vindaloo –  I thought the prospect of breathing fire would not be goon on a 1st date.

She talked most of the time, which I didn’t mind. I just love to hear her voice. She’s much more traveled than I am, which is cool. She’s also a college grad, which is a bit intimidating with my “only some college” education. But she and I really seem to connect, which is why I asked her out.

Madeline is smelling me now, perhaps I give off some type of pheromone when I think about Elena.

Anyway, had a good meal and then went to the movie. I was a bit tricky & got my car parked first (the entrance we were originally at closed at 9:30) and purchased the movie tickets. She gave me a grin/dirty look, but I think she was amused.

Anyway, I was SO nervous during the movie… should I take her hand? Now? Now?

Finally, about 45 minutes in I just said the hell with it & reached out for her hand and held it.

She was so warm and soft. I thought I caught a small smile as I took her hand. Yay me! I couldn’t believe it was going so well.

But, alas, nervous Stephen and warm Elena hand makes for sweaty hands. I REALLY didn’t want to release her, but I figured a puddle would soon develop.

So I figured, what the hell again, and released her hand and with a simple “May I?” put my arm around her.

Ok, I was now a VERY happy Stephen. Not in THAT way, just happy to feel her on my arm.

The rest of the movie passed in a blur. To hell with the Autobots and Decepticons. My night could have ended there & I would have been content.

So, of course, good triumphed over evil and the movie ended. Awwww.

After the movie she went to the restroom & I waited for her. I could still smell her perfume/soap on my clothes, and it made me giddy like a school girl.

Yeah, I’ve got a bad crush on her, can you tell?

So she dropped me off at my car on the other side of the mall & said the words that I knew would be next.

“You are a really great guy, and I hate to be having this conversation with you, but I do have a girlfriend in New York.”

I was totally ok with it. Ok, maybe not totally, but I had expected it. We decided.. well, I offered that we could go out as friends the next time. I have to be careful of the dreaded “friend zone”.

I want to be more than friends with her, but if we only start out as friends I can understand. She did say that if she became single I would be the first one on her list.

It kinda sounds like a brush off, but I guess I’m gullible… I believe her.

So now I have a choice, do I try to wear her down & be a bastard to lure her away from her relationship.. or do I just be the best friend she could ever want?

I don’t think I could live with myself if I played the part of the bastard, but my heart goes thumpity-thump whenever I see her.

So I guess I’ve just be Steve & see what happens.

-S

P.S. –  Wow –  4 pages! You might think I like this girl or something.

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